Q. What did the antibody go to the Halloween costume party as?

A. As an "immunogobulin"

♥
THE HARVARD LAW OF BIOLOGY

  Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, 

temperature, volume, humidity, and other variables the organism 

will do as it damn well pleases.
♥
How did the herpetologist know he would be married soon?

He caught the garter snake.

♥

Do molecular biologists wear designer genes?

♥

  A boy frog telephones the Psychic Hotline. His Personal Psychic

Advisor tells him, "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl 

who will want to know everything about you."

  The frog is thrilled, "This is great! Will I meet her at a party?"

  "No," says his advisor, "in her biology class."

♥

Handy guide to modern science:

If it's green or wriggles, it's biology.

If it stinks, it's chemistry.

If it doesn't work, it's physics.

♥

Q: What is the fastest way to determine the sex of a chromosome?
A: Pull down its genes.

♥

At NIH (National Institute of Health), there is a sign on the door of a microbiology lab that reads “STAPH ONLY!”

♥

Q. What does DNA stand for?
A. National Dyslexics Association

♥

The following is a true story about an anatomist.

One day after sleeping badly, an anatomist went to his frog laboratory and removed from a cage one frog with white spots on its back. He placed it on a table and drew a line just in front of the frog. “Jump frog, jump!” he shouted. The little critter jumped two feet forward. In his lab book, the anatomist scribbled, “Frog with four legs jumps two feet.”

Then, he surgically removed one leg of the frog and repeated the experiment. “Jump, jump!” To which, the frog leaped forward 1.5 feet. He wrote down, “Frog with three legs jumps 1.5 feet.”

Next, he removed a second leg. “Jump frog, jump!” The frog managed to jump a foot. He scribbled in his lab book, “Frog with two legs jumps one foot.”

Not stopping there, the anatomist removed yet another leg. “Jump, jump!” The poor frog somehow managed to move 0.5 feet forward. The scientist wrote, “Frog with one leg jumps 0.5 feet.”

Finally, he eliminated the last leg. “Jump, jump!” he shouted, encouraging forward progress for the frog. But despite all its efforts, the frog could not budge. “Jump frog, jump!” he cried again. It was no use; the frog would not response. The anatomist thought for a while and then wrote in his lab book, “Frog with no legs goes deaf.”

♥

Amoebaes 

    |

./  |

Ameoba vaulting a high fence

!

Ameoba with a bakers hat

,

Ameoba with a broken leg

*.

Ameoba with a flashlight

@.

Ameoba with a French Horn

(.)

Ameoba wearing antlers

.-

Ameoba with a rifle

?

Ameoba with an umbrella

.}

Ameoba with a bow and arrow

_._

Ameoba with flat feet

.

o=o

Ameoba skateboarding

.. 

Ameobas having a conversation

:::::::::::::::::::

:::::::::::::::::::

:::::::::::::::::::

Ameobas in a parade

:

:

Ameoba balancing act

%

Ameobas on a see-saw

.?

Confused ameoba

.!

Shocked ameoba

o

Bodybuilding ameoba

O

Bodybuilding ameoba on steroids

.

Ameoba disguised as a full stop 

.

Ameoba hiding behind a full stop

.

Full stop disguised as an ameoba

.<

Ameoba with a megaphone

 o

.|

Ameoba waiting for the bus

_____

|  .  |

Ameoba goalkeeper

o.o

Ameoba with glasses

_

Squashed ameoba

.h

Ameoba hiding behind a chair

|

Stretched ameoba

-.-

-------------------

Ameoba on the high wire

 o

o  o

 .

Ameoba juggling

.#

Ameoba hiding behind a haystack

&.

Ameoba with a party blower

.........

Ameobas in a queue

\./

Ameoba with chopsticks

"."

Ameoba with large eyebrows

.?

Ameoba with wig blowing away in the wind

?.?

Ameoba vampire bat

.(

Ameoba with a satellite dish

   \/

. [__]

Ameoba watching TV

    \/

./ [__]

amoeba watching Playboy Channel

.>

Ameoba with a boomerang

.-.

Two ameobas carrying a log

.|

Ameoba tossing the caber

.-8

Clockwork ameoba

e.

Speaking ameoba

*

Ameoba octopus

.z

Sleeping ameoba

*.*

Ameoba with pom-poms

Related posts:

1. Cell Animation: You Need to See This!
2. Population Genetics
3. Meet Riley